I thought the Bachelorette was on tonight, so here I am with my glass of wine disappointed watching DWTS instead haha! My girl KB is killing it though.
It's be a few weeks since I've last updated you all! Life has been hectic, but it's 2020.
We've really been focusing on getting through our grief and I feel like we really are getting through it and becoming stronger. We lost our baby and my grandfather within two weeks and y'all, it was ROUGH.
BUT - I have great news! I went to the doctor Friday and all of my blood results are NEGATIVE. I'm considered in the clear from our Molar Pregnancy. My numbers have been so low the last few check ups but, they have to monitor you for serval months after to make sure the tissue isn't growing back. I've thanked God several times this weekend, but it'll never do my feelings justice. Those first few weeks after our miscarriage came with so many uncertainties - but, here we are - on the other side.
I've had so many people reach out, not just women but, men looking to help support their significant others as well. It's been an experience to realize how many people go through this and how we really need to do our part to talk about it and take away all of the stigma's that surround this part of life.
I did want to take this moment to answer the question I got the most over the last few months.
My friend just had a miscarriage - how can I help?
I can't speak for your friend. Everyone is different. Some want to be surrounded by their people, and some one to be alone. My husband and I took each day at a time for how we felt. My husband more often then not wants to be alone for his tough days - but, when this happened to us he wanted to be surrounded by our people so much. For me there were a couple of days where I just wanted to be alone, or for us to be alone. I just wanted time to try and process everything. Our people showed up though. Just be available, and don't be offended if your person just needs some time. Know that while the initial grief may be short for some, that doesn't mean they are "over it" and that days won't hurt in the future.
Be patient for your people.
Sweet gifts are so thoughtful, but they are't expected at all! My friends sent such nice/thoughtful gifts. I'll add just a few for ideas.
-Cozy pjs & socks because I had to have surgery
-DoorDash gift cards so Juan and I didn't have to cook or a cooked meal.
-Sweet in memory of gifts like a necklace or keychain
-Chocolate, snacks, peace lilies etc
Lastly, a simple "how are you" can go a long way. Whether your friend answers truthfully or not, just knowing you care and you'd be there in a heartbeat means more than you know. I will also add a few "what not to say"
-It'll happen when it happens
-you can try again
-At least you weren't that far along
-It just wasn't your time
-At least you can get pregnant
-It wasn't far enough along to be a real baby
I'm sure theres a million - but these were mine and they hurt.
I'm sure this won't be the last time I post about this, but my intentions are to continue to work though my own journey but, more importantly to continue to be a voice for others and a safe space for them.
What's next for us:
We're both getting back into the swing of normal life with our everyday jobs and we are BUSY. With the Holiday's coming up Juan is getting into his "busy season" at work and I've been trying to learn more in my day to day role at my job - However y'all know I can't go long without a project. Our next home project will most likely be our laundry room. I'm starting to scope our a new washer and dryer for the space but I think Black Friday will be the best upcoming sale. So for the time being I'll be prepping the space and getting ready to remodel that space. EEK!
I've also been working on some fun stuff for the blog and I'm looking forward to the holidays! I started a LiketoKnowit page in order to track all of the products we've been using to remodel the house but also to share a bit of my fun fashion journey. If you have the app here's the link
Stay tuned for all the fun thing headed our way - and thank you for following our journey thus far!!